Balzer the wakeboarder

Not Wakeboarder of the Year: James Balzer. Rode a wakeboard once this summer and walked away with $6,000.

Not Trick of the Year: Any wrapped trick without a solid grab. The grab is the whole point of the trick, not squeezing in another 180 or 360…

Shane Bonifay dirty stache

Trash-stache of the Year: Shane Bonifay. Just watch the PB Doc…

Shaving training for Bob

Not-stache of the Year: Bob Soven. He actually went months without shaving with zero visible results.

Not Tweeter of the Year: Phil Soven

Tweeter of the Year: Bob Soven

Benny buzzed

Haircut of the Year: Ben Greenwood (he shaved!)

Blogspot of the Year: TIE — Chad Sharpe and Shredtown

Not Blog of the Year: Almost every other pro wakeboard blogger

Smokey and the ladies

“Not Fair, Bro” party move of the Year: Clear Lake legend Smokey stealing all the ladies in his classic Correct Craft during Feet on Fire.

Danny Harf Impression of the Year: Jimmy LaRiche (even though he’s not even trying)

Overall Impressionist of the Year: Parks Bonifay. Ask him to do Rusty Malinoski or Chad Sharpe.