Halloween Office Party!
If you like high fives, panda bears, cavemen, the Mile High Club, and Bill McCaffray circa 1995 (or as I like to call him, Hit It Bill) then read this article. If you don’t, then you’re lame…
Everyone knows Halloween is one of the best holidays of the year. You can guiltlessly steal candy from people, dress up like whatever you want, learn to drink beer through various costume oversights, and if your lucky you might get to watch two people dressed like superheroes get in a fight over who spilt beer on who. So it's time to suit up and get down at the Alliance office for the Halloween office party!
The party warm-ups started with hockey star Rusty Manoff (actually Keith Kipp) practicing his break aways and power stops, which quickly turned into freestyle rollerblade tricks with Captain and Mile High Club member Russell Spencer. During this the panda was put to work doing serious physical labor in exchange for (not) beer and snacks. After warm-ups were over, it was time for the main event.
Once the (not) beer was flowing and the L.F. crew and friends showed up it was time to get weird. The party started off with panda mating calls muffled by crunching bamboo, the only taker being a small dog dressed as an elephant (like I said… get weird). Don and Susan Wallace were too busy drinking Bud Heavy and rocking hard to Dokken to pay a visit to the accounting office above us with Panda, caveman and fighter pilot to recruit people to the party. They were not as amused with us as we obviously were. Downstairs was a mix of 80's metal, lifeguards, tourists, and Lindsay Lohan still pretending she's a lesbian. So… Not much different than the average day I guess.
Everything finished up to be a perfect day; except for the caveman taking women without consent and our UK Editor Sim Bradley misunderstanding that Halloween is a pretending holiday, not to actually transform into Sid Viscous and break shit in the office. We are now in the market for the following…
Office chair (1)
Fax machine (1)
Rollerblades (1 pair)
It was a day to remember and a night to pick up the pieces for Alliance this Halloween. (which is why this article took a week to get online)