By David Hanson

How many times have you had a long day at school or work and all you wanted to do was come home and hit the glass?  It is what gets most us through the long hard day (unless of course you wakeskate for a living).  You see, wakeskating is a medicine.  It realigns your chi, gets your mind right, and lets you release your worries into the water.  I think that’s what makes us love what we do.  But we must be on the alert.  There are threats to our beloved activity floating luminously on the horizon everywhere you look.  Fortunately for you guys knowledge is power, and we at AllianceWakeskate have brought you a comprehensive list of dangerous threats that constantly try to steal your shred away from you.  Just remember, stay strong, keep your eyes on the prize, and fight the good fight.

Pleasure Boaters

THREAT LEVEL: LOW

Let’s not lie to ourselves, wakeskating itself is not so far from the “pleasure boating” crowd.  I mean, we’re just out on the water enjoying ourselves as much as they are.  But the difference lies in our desire to preserve good water, rather than .  I kind of like pleasure boaters though, you can tell they really appreciate having a good relaxing time on the lake.  But they still ruin your pass.


Yahoo jetskiers

THREAT LEVEL: SEVERE

Whoa… these guys are wild and seem to always want to race everybody they pass, or at least try to make everyone look at how fast they are going.  Nice, chief.  I’ll check out your rice burner later, too.  Grab an energy drink and let’s do this.

Wakeboarders

THREAT LEVEL: ELEVATED

Wakeboarders are our buddies and brethren of the shred.  Common courtesy and proper etiquette are key, and communication will make everyone have a better time and split the good water.  Be reasonable though, no one likes being told what to do, so sometimes you just got to deal with what you got.


Pro Wakeboarders

THREAT LEVEL: SEVERE

If you live around the central Florida area it is not such a bad chance that there is at least one professional wakeboarder that you have to split the lake with.  The thing is, these guys and gals make their living riding behind a boat, but don’t let them trick you into believing they have any more say over the lake than you do.  As always, be courteous and reasonable.  Remember, they’re just people too.  Some are cooler than others, and some get real heated at your little inconvenient jet ski wakes rolling through their pass (you would think they would be grateful for the “training conditions”).  Funny how you never hear about wakeskaters confronting pro boarders about gigantic rollers destroying everything in their pass, and we’re not even strapped in!  Time to turn the tables, wakeskaters.


Hydrilla

THREAT LEVEL: ELEVATED.

It clogs up your ski, wraps around your prop, makes it hard to build rails, and makes you itchy as hell.  I myself have gotten stranded for nearly an hour in a heavy patch of this evil lake weed.  Definitely can put a damper in your glorious day of shredding.


Fisherman

THREAT LEVEL: GUARDED

Not only will they get mad at you from their boats (that are always in the glassiest spots), they can also get mad at you and give the ole’ “one finger salute” from a dock if you are on a small enough lake.  I’ve even had a fisherman that was on MY dock get miffed because we were using it to go riding.  Pretty much everyone has their own fisherman story.  Fortunately for wakeskaters, most jet skis are way quicker than what most fisherman are working with, and if anything they are just going to go away to a different spot with a grumpy look on their face.

Tubers

THREAT LEVEL: HIGH

Tubers pretty much have the exact opposite goal on the water than wakeskaters.  Rather than preserve good water and get their souls wet, they enjoy doing circles and boosting off as many rollers as they can create.  No one can deny how fun it is at certain points to get a little buck wild out there, but the weekend wallys that always seem to be taking their tube experience to the next level get a little old.

Wind

THREAT LEVEL: GUARDED

Ah, the age old wakeskate enemy.  You have to respect the wind though.  It is what makes us get up early, determines which line we ride, and can even sometimes affect what tricks we try.  It is a major part of your riding every set, and for that you can’t really get mad.


Police
THREAT LEVEL: HIGH

Getting hassled by a policeman can very oftentimes lead to a ticket, mostly because wakeskaters are punks.  We also seem to rarely wear the right type of vest, or wear one at all, and we never have the money to afford any type of tickets they give us (nor the registration for the jet ski that expired three years ago).

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